A Burdened Mind
by moonswirl
Summary: Gleekathon, day 1044a: The accident was one thing, but when she hears about the long term effects... semi-sequel to "The customer you are trying to reach" - Faves cycle, day 15 of 21, Top 5 friendships - Number 2


_Started my daily ficlets to make the hiatus pass, then decided to keep going with a 2nd cycle, and then a 3rd, 4th, etc through 49th cycle. Now cycle 50!_

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**CYCLE 50 SPECIAL FAVORITES CHART - **_So I've done 'favorites' cycles before, and this is another one, but since it's cycle 50, I wanted to do something special for it. So instead of the usual top 16 with a 6-chapter Boston Britt installment for Brittany (who has always been and remains number one ;)), this is how it will be: It's shift days through the cycle. Shift B will be a 21-chapter/day Boston Britt. In shift A, after the first day's 'extra' dedicated to New Directions, there will be four Top 5 lists, working their way down (all the number 5 spots, all the number 4 spots, number 3, 2, and finishing with all the number one spots)_

_The Top 5's are as follows (all are my 'top 5 favorite...'):  
* Top 5 Series (my series)  
* Top 5 Friendships  
* Top 5 Characters  
* Top 5 Relationships_

_**TODAY: Top 5 Friendships: #2 - Rachel & Quinn**  
_

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_**This is a double shift day.** There will be one more upload today: Those Are Wooden Wings, chapter 15._

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**"A Burdened Mind"  
Rachel & Quinn  
(semi-sequel to "The Customer You Are Trying To Reach")**

Hearing about Quinn's accident already she could feel her heart fill with this feeling like it had been her fault. It had not truly crossed her mind, the fact that she'd be on the road, that her constant texting to her would create this kind of distraction where Quinn would find herself rolling in the path of another vehicle. She'd known something had to have gone wrong when she wasn't showing up, wasn't answering her phone, but actually hearing what had happened, it was worse.

She was alive though, and she tried to focus on that, not the rest, and that was all fine… until she found out the next part, when the word "wheelchair" came into the equation. It was like she'd had a great shock, an explosion that had thrown her back and now her ears were ringing and would continue to until she could adjust.

They would always say the same thing. It wasn't her fault, she wasn't to blame… So why did she still feel like she should? She'd been so focused on this whole wedding, and then that had happened, and now this…

She had to see her, had to say something to her. She didn't know what that thing would be yet, but when she'd be standing in front of her, she'd know… she hoped.

She was nervous as she arrived at the hospital… What if she was angry at her? The first time she'd come to see her, after the accident, she'd shown no feelings of blame, but now with this… maybe she'd have changed her tune. If that was the case, then Rachel would just have to take it; she deserved it, really.

When she got to Quinn's room though, the sight she found was even more heartbreaking than she'd have expected. She was alone in her room, sitting in her wheelchair, parked in front of the window and looking out. She looked so small in there. It was not uncommon for a hospital patient to be made to go around in a wheelchair, but in her case that was not what the chair was there for, and if it was possible, Rachel could see it in the way she occupied the thing.

"You can come in, you know?" She flinched, not having expected Quinn's voice before she announced herself.

"How did you…" Rachel took a couple of steps forward, as Quinn turned her head. Her bruises and cuts had begun to heal, which was a relief to see, though only to a point.

"You have a distinctive walk… and the perfume," Quinn revealed.

"I d…" she started, then paused and took a breath. "I'm not intruding, am I?"

"Not at all. Come sit, please," Quinn indicated a couch, and so Rachel went to sit, while Quinn approached.

"You know, I kind of have a whole new respect for Artie right now," she commented, and Rachel couldn't help but feel like there was more she wasn't saying.

"I heard a… about your… the…" she hesitated, her finger carefully pointing.

"The wheelchair… yeah," Quinn nodded, and after a beat of silence, a sniffle broke through. "Rachel?"

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to start… But… I'm just… It's my fault, all this."

"It's not, okay?" Quinn insisted. "You know it isn't, I told you before, when you were here…"

"But it is," Rachel wouldn't let go.

"If it were your fault, then I would blame you. Do you see any blame, hear any blame?" she asked.

"No…" Rachel was forced to answer after a moment.

"That's because there isn't. Now, please… I'm happy to see you, so the frown has to go," she smiled, and Rachel was surprised, but still a smile escaped her.

"You are?" she asked, her eyes briefly fluttering.

"Don't sound so surprised…"

"I-I'm not, it's just… I don't know…" she sighed, then nodded to herself as though to realign her thoughts, and turned a more optimistic face up to her. She wasn't sure how long it would hold, but it was there. "So how… how are you doing? You look good. O-or, well…" she hesitated. "You're smiling, that's good to see," she gave a tentative smile.

"Well I'm alive, aren't I? If that's not a reason to smile, I don't know what is," Quinn gave a shrug. "You know you're one of the few people who've come to see me?"

"Really?" Rachel was surprised.

"It's okay though. I mean, I get it," she looked down at herself. Rachel may not have been 'allowed' to express her guilt over the accident and the result, but she was here, and she could do something good for a friend…

"You want to go outside? Are you allowed to…" she thought immediately.

"Yes, I can," Quinn smirked. "And yeah, that'd be great actually." Rachel stood and approached, then paused.

"Do you want me to push you, or do you want to do it yourself."

"I'll do it," Quinn nodded, wheeling herself out toward the door. "My mother just goes right to push me," she revealed. "Sometimes I don't mind, if I'm already tired, something like that, but I prefer doing it myself if I can."

"Why don't you tell her?" Rachel asked, walking slower to keep up with her.

"Because… she wants to help, and that's something, so…" Quinn explained.

"Got it," Rachel nodded. "Miss you at school," she told her as she held the door and Quinn wheeled out into daylight. "It's just not the same without you there."

"Well don't get used to it, because I will be back," Quinn told her.

"Better be," Rachel gave her a smile. Seeing Quinn now, seeing how she reacted to her presence, Rachel could feel the guilt slowly leave her. Quinn didn't put this on her in the least, so why should she? Her energy could be put to much better use, like being there for her.

THE END

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******A/N: This is a one-shot ficlet, which means that signing up for story alert will not bring you any alerts.  
****In the event of a sequel, the story will be separate from this one. And as chapter stories go, they are  
************always clearly indicated as such [ex: "Days 204-210" in the summary] Thank you!**


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